(And Other Things That Happened at the TikTok Accelerator retreat)

I was so honoured to be part of TikTok’s second ever Accelerator retreat for agencies, especially since it was set against the stunning backdrop of tropical Noosa. But I did go into the event with a big old case of imposter syndrome. Did I belong here? Bolster’s an indie, how do we stack up against the OMDs, PHDs and Dentsus of the world? I’ve never studied advertising or marketing, do I deserve to be here? Do I get marketing? Do I know what I’m talking about? Why do I feel so old compared to this cohort, yet somehow so inexperienced at the same time? Why have does it feel like I’ve done nothing at all during my career so far?

It was funny arriving at the event with all of these insecurities, because over the three days with our cohort of thirty, we all shared similar emotions. None of us felt qualified to be there. It was very fitting that the incredible Nicole Hatherly was the first speaker at our retreat. Nicole’s a thought leader in personal branding and an executive leadership coach. Her impressive resume is rounded out by a stint at Leo Burnett in the 90s, leading successful advertising pitches for global brands.

Nicole’s first session focused on personal brands, and her advice on how we should structure our personal elevator pitches. Her framework is:

1. Context: What are your three areas of expertise? This might include your job title and your speciality.

2. Audience: Who are your main clients? What category or industry do they belong to? Are your clients prestigious and well-known? Internal teams count as clients too.

3. Value: What’s your impact for your clients? What are the top 3 outcomes you successfully deliver?

4. Authority: What’s your proof that you can talk the talk and walk the walk? What experience do you have? How many years have you done this? Do you have any awards to your name?

We all had time to workshop our personal pitch, and this is what I landed on:

I’m a marketing specialist with a background in psychology, and am Australia’s leading expert on music marketing. I work with award-winning music festivals, tour promoters and arts festivals to sell out without selling out, and cement themselves as global icons. I do this with my 15 years of selling literally millions of tickets, helping artists land #1 ARIA albums, selling out festivals in mere minutes and promoting singles that have now clocked over 1B streams.

When I read mine out to the cohort, I felt so cringe and wanted to diminish my value and joke about how I’m actually terrible at marketing. Tall poppy syndrome, anyone? But Nicole used this as an opportunity for some sage advice, which I’ll loosely paraphrase: “Don’t be afraid to take control of your personal brand. It exists even if you don’t want it to, so you might as well make it what you want.”

Funnily enough, a few years ago I told a very close friend of mine that my career aspiration was to be the leading authority in music marketing and get paid thousands of dollars to speak on the topic. I can confirm that Bolster has sent out a few very hefty invoices for me to speak at music industry events of late. I feel so insanely proud but also—oddly enough—it brings up a lot of guilt.

That brings me beautifully full circle to the last session of the whole retreat. We had been warned the night before by TikTok’s head of agency that this session ran last year and it was a tear-jerker. Boy, was he right.

The esteemed Layne Beachley wrapped up the whole event with a very emotional session about limiting beliefs. You may know Layne as one of the world’s top surfers, which would be a very accurate assessment as she’s taken seven World Championship trophies home. Impressively six of those were won in consecutive years; not many people in the world can claim the same.

Layne’s 90-minute session started with her heartbreaking origin story. She was adopted into a loving family as an infant and when she subsequently found out that she was adopted, her way of coping was to set her sights on a formidable task: become a world surf champion. Her first and last win came from a place of loving the process. All the wins in between were born of fear and self punishment. I won’t go into detail as I won’t do her story justice, but her background set the scene for a stirring workshop on limiting beliefs.

She had us write down our goals. Mine was to be the leading authority on music marketing in Australia. (Sense a pattern?) And then we had to write down our ‘yes but’ statements for this target. A ‘yes but’ statement is literally anything that the naysayer in you might scoff in reply to your lofty plans.

My statements were:

• Yeah but I don’t have a degree in advertising.

• Yeah but self-proclaimed experts are wankers and dickheads.

• Yeah but if I elevate myself it reduces the opportunity for women and POC to advance.

I could feel my face get hot as I wrote down that last one. It really struck a nerve, but in a strange way because I’ve never thought of it explicitly. Layne asked a few people to volunteer theirs if they felt comfortable and then she ran out of volunteers and singled me out to answer. I probably could’ve said pass, but I started to read it out anyway and actually burst into tears reading the last one. It’s actually so incredibly fucked up that I feel guilt over this, despite literally being a woman of colour and an immigrant. There are scores of cisgendered white men out there who don’t feel any guilt about using their privilege to get ahead. Honestly some of them probably don’t even realise their privilege exists. I wonder in part if it’s because I’ve had to endure so many stereotypes and racial/gender micro-aggressions as a WOC in music and advertising, and have just completely internalised this now.

We then workshopped turning these ‘yeah but’ remarks into ‘yes and’ thoughts. Mine became:

• Yes and I have 15 years of marketing experience, plus a psychology degree to back up my thinking.

• Yes and I can be a humble expert who uses my knowledge to help, and not gate keep information.

• Yes and I can be a leader who elevates other women and people of colour with the authority I have.

That was the most honest and vulnerable I’ve ever been in a work setting before. But Layne Beachley gave me a hug after 😇 Thanks, TikTok.